Psilocin + Ketamine

Age:18

Weight: 125 lbs

Dosage: ~30 mg Psilocin oral in solution, …”a lot” of ketamine insufflated

Setting: Around Fairmount Park

T0:00-I walk to my special tripping place-a park in Philly with a secluded bit hidden away along train tracks. I chug down the bottle of vile moldy tryptamine water. I almost throw up. I sit down and smoke a bowl and wait for the come up.

T0:30-I begin feeling the first effects. This wasn’t a rapid onset like my last experience with this chemical. The world around me begins to look brighter, I start to get that usual psychedelic feeling of my body losing its weight and its physical form. I feel light, my flesh slowly replaced by a sort of buzzing feeling. I am sitting on railroad ballast and broken glass, the ballast begins to breathe and warp and swirl beneath me as colors grow brighter.

T0:50-I can feel the tryptamine wave building within me getting ready to break-now is the time. I pull out my little premeasured packet of K and suck it all up.

T1:10-The tryptamine has broken over. The sounds of the road above me swirl together into an abstract mess of roars, hums, buzzes, and echoing reverberations. The trees are beginning to twist into repeating fractals, mirroring themselves over and over. And my body-I can feel my body slowly fading and fading, movement is becoming more difficult as my limbs begin to feel numb and like wet noodles.

T1:30-Everything has hit full force now. The ketamine has locked me curled into a ball. I can move, but I see no reason to. I cannot tell if my eyes are opened or closed. My entire world is a strange flat bliss composed chunks of my surroundings. In this flat image that composes my entire existence are bits of railroad ballast…snippets of dreams and memories…images of myself from first and third person… trees, my existence is this flat collage of my experience. I am not viewing it, it is literally everything. I don’t have a body or some external form to view it from, thus it is everything and I am it. The only bit of stimulus that remains independent from this is sound-freight trains come by every so often and my existence becomes consumed by the sound of their wheels screeching on the tracks, tearing through my mind. My existence is a collage of experiences punctuated by the sound of tons of metal blasting along more metal, jarring me to my core.

T2:00-I am ruminating on this experience, why is this different from a sober state, what is different about this? This is a common path of thought I entertain myself with while under heavy influences. Well for one I cannot feel my body. It is completely numb, I am not aware of having a body, and I am not aware of where any of my limbs are or where any part of my body is in relation to another part. I am curled into this vulnerable little ball in a park under a bridge. Two, I am barely aware of the world around me. I am trapped in my mind, and it is an alien mind. All my thoughts are hyperamplified to the point where subconscious performance of actions becomes impossible. Normally, if I wanted to walk, I would just walk, no thought. In this state, if I wanted to walk, I had to explicitly think about walking, what action I need to perform, to override the nonstop torrent of thought. And the thoughts, oh my god my thoughts. I only remember such relentless thinking from my first and most powerful mushroom experience. One thought flowed into another with such swiftness and efficiency that I couldn’t stop and think to another thought process. One thought would be related to another, and that would blossom into more related thoughts, and so on, with absolutely no pause, not a beat skipped. I literally could not consciously think what I wanted, I was at the mercy of this maelstrom of thought, floating on its tempestuous surface as they dragged me around and tossed me about.

T2:30-I begin to regain a sense of my surroundings. My thoughts are still moving a mile a minute, but I can rein them in now. I can think what I want, and though the genesis of that thought is in my control, it quickly begins to blossom and bloom like before into chains of thought that if I don’t try to lasso them in, grow out of control and prevent me from performing normal processes. I stand up and try to walk. I feel like I am on a rocking boat, every step wavers and shakes me about. I still have no idea where my body parts are in relation to one another. My limbs feel out of proportion and I have to look to make sure I know where they are. I leave my safe place and get ready for my next big challenge.

T2:45-Before me is a very busy road. It’s rush hour. There’s no light or crosswalk or anything. Just timing. The speed limit is about 50, cars are moving very fast. This is a huge challenge for someone who can barely stand up. Everything dances with color and each car leaves a trail behind it. I have trouble telling how far away they are, my depth perception is completely skewed. I sit down on a rock and draw while waiting for the traffic to slow down. I can feel myself slowly coming down, but I’m still very up. I am mostly in control of my thoughts now though I can still feel them somewhat drifting astray. I still wobble like a drunk.

T2:55-I did it! I ran across the street! Okay now I am going to journey to the art museum, about a half mile’s walk. I wander in that direction. I feel the same sort of inflated confidence I felt coming down from the mystery tryptamine the first time. It feels great, I feel great.

T3:15-By the time I reach the art museum, that has worn off. Now I just feel tired and worn and still very numb and wobbly from the K. Some friends text me, I’m going to go meet them apparently.

T3:40-I’ve met friends. We’ve driven to a park. One of them wants to try K. We smoke a bowl and I cut him some. I want some more. In the process of measuring it out, I spill it. Everywhere. All over a wooden picnic table. It falls into the cracks, the wood grain, it’s impossible to get out. It dawns on me-I paid for this K, and there is only one way to get it out. I shrug, roll up a dollar, and suck all of it out like a vacuum cleaner.

T4:00-We decide to walk around the park. I can still walk fine, communicate fine. I can feel a rising feeling, I can feel myself starting to come up on the K. I feel lighter, number, and heavier. Everything begins to sound distant and my perception of this park becomes very screwy as objects appear to be really close or really far away when in fact they are neither (the fact that it’s night doesn’t help things). We walk to a gazebo only to find a naked man doing…something… in there…. We leave him in peace. We decide to get a blanket and have a picnic. Walking back, I can feel it full force, I feel like I am being dragged and tossed about on a ship in a storm as my body wobbles to and fro. My limbs feel like wet noodles. It feels a lot like DXM. My mouth feels completely numb so talking is very difficult. I think I babble out some words to my friends, I doubt they make sense. I sit down. I sink into my seat, my body feels like a tree or a statue. It is still, yet in motion, in its place. I am sitting still, but my essence is sloshing about in its stoic frame. The visuals kick in. The world begins to fill with high contrast, everything looks cartoony or cel-shaded. Then it begins to look like a painting, everything composed of sweeping swirling and flowing brush strokes. It looks like a van gogh painting-then the painting briefly gives way to feeling like I am made of icing, that I am composed of sloppy sweet sugary goodness. I get up and try to walk around more and it feels GREAT. I feel so in my head so my movement all feels so free and automatic, and it’s incredible. I drift around like a big wet sloppy ghost, the world a swirling impressionist painting/cartoon around me. I fall over a lot and have to hold onto things for balance and safety. We eventually decide to leave the park.

T4:30-I get in the car after much bodily struggle and lie down in the back. This is such beautiful nostalgia, I feel like my first times on weed. It reminds me of back in the day when I’d get REALLY high, too high to function normally, but I would still go out and try to function, and it was amazing. Such beautiful nostalgia… I miss everything so much… Anyways.

T4:40-I sit in the back of the car. The speakers are behind my head. I don’t recognize any of my surroundings despite us driving through familiar places. I am enraptured in the music, it is everything. We get water ice. It tastes alright I guess. We hang out in the parking lot until we meet another friend. At this point I’m already feeling kinda down, there is just numbness in my body and still a lack of knowing where my limbs are.

T5:00-I’m mostly down now. I feel residual effects of the ketamine for the next 3 hours, but not anything too remarkable.