O-DSMT

 Age: 25

Weight: 130 lbs

Dosage: 75 mg oral in gel cap + 30 mg oral

Setting: At the park, my house

 

Preface: I am frankly not too experienced in the world of opioids, but I had the opportunity to obtain and try this fairly popular rc opioid. Tramadol itself is a unique opioid for its nonselective receptor activity, acting as a SNRI and 5HT2c antagonist. This yields a fairly unique experience with similarly unique and potentially dangerous interactions with other substances. O-DSMT lacks the serotonin reuptake inhibition that Tramadol has, but retains the norepinephrine reuptake inhibition, which yields a unique stimulating effect. This is opposed to most of the classical opioids, especially those that are structural analogues of morphine, which primarily act as mu-opioid agonists. I was to meet up with a friend who was much more experienced in the world of opioids to hang out for a bit, then I had the rest of the day to myself.

 

T0:00- Dose taken in gel cap.

 

T0:30- Not feeling much yet- a sort of faintness, a faded warmth in my body, a sense that my mind has become slower and duller, though it may be placebo. The sun shines and wanes through dappled cloud cover on this mostly overcast day. I disembark from my house to meet my friend down near the park. I have weighed out a 30 mg booster dose in case my 75 mg is not enough.

 

T0:40- Walking outside seems to suppress what little effects I was feeling. I am definitely off baseline however- the shining sun feels especially distant, the November air feels pensive on my outer layers. We link up near the park- an abandoned pier that had been remodeled into a green space.

My friend is quite experienced with opioids and has a particular affinity for O-DSMT. He informs me that I am yet to experience the peak effects, that there is a long slow comeup before I should begin to really feel the opioid effects. We hang out on the pier and talk about drugs and such. I am continuously taking hits of cannabis from my one hitter. Socializing feels normal, I am perhaps a bit chattier than usual despite feeling slower in my head, but it otherwise feels fairly standard. He says my pupils have contracted quite a bit though it is not too visible on my dark irises.

 

T1:30- We walk back to his car. We were maybe going to arrange a pickup of some PCP but it fell through. I wait and look at my phone, all of the information contained within feels overwhelming right now and brings me no joy, I don’t have much desire to engage with it.

 

T1:45- I get a short ride back to my house. I decide to redose- opening the capsule up so it hits faster. I don’t have water or anything to choke it down however and end up spilling a lot of the powder into my mouth. He tells me it has a really interesting and unique flavor, which I soon experience firsthand- initially the biting terrible bitterness that one would expect from any drug- though after a minute or two this gives way to an odd sort of cold sweetness, not unpleasant at all, reminiscent of the light powdery flavor of stevia. What a curious sensation. I begin to feel stronger effects kick in, stronger physical sedation and a bit of a nervous energy in my bones. I don’t think the redose has landed yet, it’s just the first dose coincidentally peaking at this moment.

 

T1:50- Walking back to my front door and it feels like the effects are surging. I feel heavier and slower, I just want to get there and get inside. A deep itching sensation begins to creep through my body- I just want to go indoors and be alone and in private and roll around on something soft and scratch at myself.

 

T2:00- I am inside now and definitely awash in it. There is a deep-set itching all through my body, but scratching at myself feel so good. It’s not localized to anywhere- it’s on my face, my scalp, all over my torso and up and down my arms and legs. A deeply euphoric physical sensation traces its way across my body too. Stretching out and nuzzling around on a soft surface feels so good, it is such a curious interplay of discomfort and pleasure. I wish I could just be kneaded into myself like a ball of clay, smeared and crushed around. I spend the next hour rubbing around, tearing at myself, reading things on the internet and listening to music loudly and taking in all of these new sensations. I hit a THC vape. There has been a remarkable lack of nausea thusfar, though I have no appetite despite eating nothing so far today.

 

T3:00- The sensations press heavier, the sedation, the waves of subtle pleasure in my muscles, the itching, it bears down more and more. I find myself catching a bit of a nod, the sensation of having an opioid’s sedation wash over a user, leaving them dazed and immobile. My eyelids are heavy and continually drift shut, and I find myself caught in a timeless daze, blissfully unaware of the world around me. In this city it is common to see people who have hit the point of being overwhelmed with the sedation, condemned to collapse and fold up wherever they’re sitting or even standing, at the mercy of opioid bliss. I certainly haven’t reached that point yet and didn’t want to push doses on a first experience, though I can easily imagine now how one can so suddenly and easily sink away from the world. I am able to open my eyes and yank myself out- it feels like suddenly waking up, or breaking out of a dissociative hole, there is a jolt and a sense of sudden blinding brightness when I open my eyes to the world. There is little desire to be in touch with the world around me though- I am content to sink and drift away. The continual itching keeps me anchored in my body.

 

T3:30- I take a bit of loratadine to try and counter the itching (I would have potentially opted for DPH but I didn’t feel like dealing with the drowsiness as it is only early afternoon).

 

T4:00- I need to run out and get produce from a nearby market before it closes. I reluctantly pull my body together, throw on some warm layers, and go for a brisk walk outside, if only to know that I will soon be rewarded by being able to stretch out on the couch again. Walking outside feels fairly normal, and I hope my constant scratching doesn’t draw too much attention to me. Notably, my face feels particularly sensitive- wherever my hair or mask or hat or clothes seem to chafe in the slightest explodes into a burning itch of the utmost urgency. I awkwardly pace the block to find an ATM to draw cash from before stopping by the produce stand- interactions are awkward and cold, I feel robotic and out of place and just want to get it over with. I just want to be back inside.

 

T4:20- I finally get back inside and have a sudden rush of energy. I put away all the produce and quickly do some household chores like washing the dishes and cleaning the kitchen up a bit. I collapse back on the couch afterwards, still itching, still nodding and drifting off. At this point I am nervous that I am going to break skin and scratch myself raw, I am constantly and consistently tearing at myself, this would be so pleasant were it not for that.

 

T4:30- I go into my backyard and smoke a joint, half regular weed and half CBD-only hemp flower. I still haven’t eaten yet today and this stimulates my appetite a bit. I am able to make and eat a bunch of dense greasy food without issue. Even sitting there and enjoying my food I catch myself nodding a bit, if I blink there’s an urge to just keep my eyes shut and drift off. I wish the itching would stop.

 

T5:00- I’m feeling genuinely drowsy by this point and lay down to take a nap. It’s hard to be comfortable with all the itching, especially as the pleasurable physical sensations begin to recede. My partner comes home from work. I stay in bed, I try to sleep but it feels more like I am still just nodding, still just drifting off into some blissful space absent of thought or feeling. I take a single 25 mg dose of DPH to try and quash the itching, though it ultimately does nothing.

 

T6:30- I am not sure if I actually fell asleep at any point but it feels as though time has passed a little faster. Still itching, still uncomfortable. I hang out with my partner for a while. I feel slow and dazed but otherwise normal.

 

T9:30- Smoke some more cannabis and eat a big dinner. By now the only sensation that remains is the itching.

 

T14:00- I take a hot shower. I feel drowsy again, and still, only the itching remains. I tear at my skin and scratch a lot and take another 25 mg dose of DPH before going to sleep. I fall asleep quickly without issue. All effects have subsided by the time I wake up the next day.

 

Conclusion: Perhaps it wasn’t good to dive into this class of drugs for what is ultimately a fairly non-standard experience from a non-standard substance. Ultimately, all pleasant and positive effects were overcome with the constant itching, deep and under my skin. It bordered on hellish at points. There wasn’t much euphoria to speak of, but there certainly was a warm pleasurable sensation running through my body at points, and a certain timeless careless bliss to letting my eyes drift shut and letting myself drift off. I would be interested in seeing the effects of other opioids of better repute, though this certainly was an interesting experience to record. I am doubtful if I will delve into this particular substance again.