Weight-120 lbs
Dose: ~30 mg 4-AcO-MET oral in gel cap, 50 mg
Allylescaline oral in gel cap
Setting: Secret place along the river, around Philly, my apartment
Set: Was planning this trip all
week. Scrambled frantically to make sure it was timed right and it would work
out. Was relieved that I was actually gonna make it work.
Setting: The secret place by the
freight tracks under a bridge in North Philly where I go to trip by myself
T0:00-Capsules taken
simultaneously
T0:20-First notes of effects.
Arrive at destination only to find a dude sleeping there. Decide it would be
best not to disturb him and to walk further up the tracks and find somewhere
new.
T0:25-Find an underpass further
up the tracks and take shelter there after looking out for suspicious persons. I
have very quickly went from a relatively urban setting to total desolation, no
buildings are in sight, only the withering trees and lonely industrial rail
space. I sit down and smoke a bowl, the effects are coming on ever so slightly
still. After I smoke I spot a rocky outcrop across the tracks, next to the
underpass. I climb up. The underpass consists of a viaduct with three arches,
the central opening for the freight tracks, the other two just being dark and
resembling tunnels. One of these tunnels is next to the outcrop. Perhaps my
senses are already compromised, as it looks like there is another person
sleeping in the neighboring tunnel.
T0:30-I listen to music and draw
pictures. It is the familiar feeling of 4-AcO-MET, where everything I draw
feels beautiful and profound. I love art or creations where everything seems
perfectly functional and well placed, and everything I draw feels like that,
each line being deliberate and serving its own exact purpose. Of course this is
total delusion, in retrospect the drawing is sloppy and scatterbrained. Visuals
aren’t picking up too much, I definitely feel very light and spacey. Very
little bodyload to speak of except for sweatiness and a slight restlessness and
nausea. I smoke a little more. I realize this is the place I would come to die,
it is beautiful, lonely and serene. When the day comes I would lie my neck down
on the tracks and wait. This is the final place, this is my final place. I don’t
feel sad or disturbed thinking about that, rather a bit giddy that I have found
a place I can claim as my own special place, in life and in death. The setting
sun strikes the haggard bushes with a light that I would love to have one day mourn
me.
T0:50-It is getting pretty dark. I
decide this probably isn’t the best place to be alone in the dark, and also I
can’t see what I’m drawing anymore. I decide it’s time to get up. I begin
walking back, the visuals and body feels are picking up ever so slightly,
though I am somewhat coherent. It is lacking the jarring perception shifts and
zoned visuals from when I did 4-AcO-MET alone, and the visuals now seem to be spiraling
and checkered patterns arising from the foliage, sky, and ground. I walk by the
sleeping dude again, this time we wakes up when I approach, I let him know I
mean no harm. I go into a nearby park and meditate to what’s left of the
sunlight. I don’t think I’m tripping that hard. But then I close my eyes. The
state I entered was whimsical and goofy. The various sounds around me
reverberate and repeat reaching a higher and higher pitch, as if the whole universe
is exploding into a big cosmic giggle. It feels corny and ridiculous honestly.
The visuals are 3-dimensional geometric shapes, with intricate polka-dot,
checkerboard, or concentric patterns. They all feel like cosmic jesters, they
are personified forms with bright personalities to match their bright colors. They
are all floating in a patterned space and are strangely lit, as if they have a
spotlight on them or have light shining from within them. They are self-transforming,
morphing into one another and interacting and splitting and infinitely nesting
within themselves. They seem to move in reaction to the various auditory
alterations. I feel my body sequentially vibrate/buzz and go numb, starting at
my extremities and working to my core, until I am nothing but this absurd
geometric space. If I open my eyes I snap back to normal and regain feeling,
but if I close my eyes the process starts again. Wow. I’m tripping really hard.
T1:10-I decide to continue my
journey and manage to get up. I am definitely peaking now. I have to cross an
extremely busy and fast road with no crosswalk and traffic in both directions.
I end up waiting 15 minutes before there is an opening. The whole time I stand
there I feel myself sinking into existence, the headlights of the cars casting
rainbow checker patterns on everything. After I cross I begin to walk across
the city.
T1:30-As I’m walking I begin to be
struck with delusions of grandeur. I feel like I can do anything, that I am
going to do anything. I feel warm and confident and super empathetic, similar
to my last time doing 4-AcO-MET. It feels so nice, but also feels very fake and
chemically induced, like some switch was flipped to induce this sense of
purpose and competence that just isn’t normally there, and based on the rest of
my existence, there is no purpose or competence in me at all. It’s fake but
feels so good, this really really feels like getting high on a drug more than a
profound trip. I sit down to take a break and sink back into the CEV world, it
has gone unchanged. Now even with my eyes open the visuals are decently vivid,
not so much in the form of alterations but rather existing heavily as patterns
covering every surface. I feel so giddy and social, I want to hang out with
people when I get home, I want to exhibit myself, show myself off, feel cool
and validated. I hit up a bunch of friends and invite them over for later.
T2:20-I’ve walked across the city
now and am almost at the subway station. Still definitely peaking. Waiting for
the subway is wild as it always is when I’m peaking. I feel like I’ve managed
to deconstruct that sense of confidence and the delusions of grandeur to allow
myself to be more grounded and less disturbed by the sheer power of delusion
this substance imbues me with. The visuals are wild and entertaining, though
not impairing by any means.
T2:45-I arrive home, spacey and
floaty. I am experiencing a degree of urinary retention, similar to the last
time I did allylescaline. I smoke some more and am kicked back up into strong
territory. I am absolutely fascinated by everything in my house and that I read
online, everything is distracting and whimsical. I decide to listen to horrendous
noise music really loudly. It sounds so perfect, like when I’m on
dissociatives. This time actually, it sounds even better, my state distorts the
noise into some unique psychedelic whirlwind of sounds, the edge of the
abrasive noises taken off by cascades of resonanace and reverberation. I lie in
bed with my eyes closed for a while listening to stuff.
T4:00-One of my friends comes
over. I am still pretty spacey and feeling very stimulated and amped up while
simultaneously just burnt the fuck out. We hang out and play videogames. More people
come over and the night just turns into an impromptu party. I am not feeling
the same way I was before with respect to being social, it no longer feels like
an opportunity to brag about myself and be validated by other people’s warmth
and love. Rather I just feel nice, high, euphoric, and it’s nice to be around
friends.
T6:00-Back to baseline.
Conclusion: I heard somewhere
that mixing 4-AcO-tryptamines with allylescaline had a unique synergy. Honestly
the allylescaline component wasn’t too noticeable and it just felt like a lower
dose than my last foray with 4-AcO-MET was (which it pretty literally was). All
the allyelscaline added perhaps was some change in the visuals and auditory
nature (the high pitched noises I have noticed from phenethylamines, while
tryptamines tend to be deeper and voluminous), and some bodyload. Nothing too
noteworthy, just a nice and very basic trip overall.
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