2016 in Review

I guess this is going to be an annual tradition as long as I am mired in this swamp... I will inevitably stop this activity or run out of new drugs to try, but until then!
So uh, I did a great deal of drugs in 2016. I would consider this year the most concentrated year of my activities to date, at least in terms of rigorous study of new substances. I have thankfully reduced my level of casual abuse, which peaked the previous year, concurrent with worsening depression. A better mental state this year has meant more responsibly (although admittedly not entirely responsible) use. My mental health has vastly improved, mostly attributable to a wonderful support network and a relationship with someone that has lasted throughout most of the year. I am really truly and deeply in love and it has helped me wrangle my still tumultuous mental state better than I ever have before, this is not even the shallow confidence gained from someone adoring me, but an infinitely deeper level of improvement, introspection, enrichment, and support coming from someone who understands my mind at a fundamental level. I love you so incredibly much, and I am grateful for your presence in my life every single day.
This is the year I had the most hallucinogenic experiences, beating out 2015 by a margin of 20 experiences. This will probably be the peak of my use, as I am literally running out of new things to try and I am losing the energy, health, time, and wherewithal to pursue this as passionately as I once did. I have now had over 200 hallucinogenic experiences, and my quantity of tasted substances has reached 70.
Looking onwards, i still wish to pursue new substances at the very least, and to pursue a more refined and more strictly regimented pattern of casual use to enhance experiences or foment self-improvement and transhumanistic practice. I aim to end the casual abuse as it is detrimental to my health and fills me with feelings of guilt and unrequited hedonism. Although it is mighty mighty fun...  there are ways to have fun and have it still be useful and productive. As far as new combinations go, I wish to end the binging behavior I often find myself doing, where I am just impulsively stacking substances on each other without any real intent or direction. In the future, I wish to only do meticulously planned and calculated combinations. Most of this stems from a desire to continue producing reports. Having received some serious feedback on my reports, I aim to produce reports of superior quality and universal usefulness to the intrepid psychonaut, especially for the bank of new and rare substances that are beginning to rear their heads in the market.
Without revealing toooo much info, I will say that I have become an active participant in the inner workings of one of the most prominent websites for harm reduction and unbiased, pragmatic information on drugs. This has certainly helped to make me feel like the knowledge I have accrued is of some use and I am happy to be providing material gains to others through my passion and interest. This is something I wish to continue indefinitely, even beyond whenever I may stop my experiments.

Anyways, here's a power ranking of every new drug I tried this year. I'll take it from the top again. Full reports for all of these are in the sidebar.

1. 3-MeO-PCE: The #1 spot for the second year in a row is a dissociative, and more specifically, a delightful little arylcyclohexamine. 3-MeO-PCE presents as MXE's more functional cousin, leaning more towards the experience given by 3-MeO-PCP but improved in every way. Rather than the usual dissociative dumbing down, this one affects cognition almost like a psychedelic, vastly improving focus and cognitive ability. This one has some serious transhumanistic and therapeutic potential, and while quite rare, I now have a substantial quantity with which I can experiment. Euphoric, colorful, and truly shows the potential to improve my life and myself. I'm excited to further familiarize myself with this.

2. Diphenidine: My experiences with this chemical are apparently non-standard. It is strikingly similar to 3-MeO-PCE, although it strikes much more of an emotional and manic chord. This is a bit more dangerous than 3-MeO-PCE as I can definitely see the potential for going off the rails a bit. But damn does this one drill to my core and really make me think and feel in a way that feels uninhibited from my sober state. This is one to be used with the utmost caution, though its rewards seem bountiful and sweet.

3. 2C-C: As is going to be established repeatedly throughout this list, bodyload is truly one of the biggest hinderances to my experimentation. Some say to embrace it, to accept it, to feel the pain, but honestly after so many times that just no longer become interesting or productive. 2C-C has blessed me with experiences entirely free of any bodyload, and in its stead, it has a quite pleasurable feel in my flesh. It's sufficiently deep, analytical, and visual, and lacks the irritating stimulation that some of its cousins have. A delightful substance that is extremely useful in combinations.

4. 2C-I: I once presumed I had taken this in the early naive days of my experimentation, sold as LSD. I have since tasted a batch that is 100% confirmed to be this, and have had nothing but interesting experiences from it. It too is not too heavy on the body, and thus has found its way into my tool chest. What really places it high on my list is that when insufflated, I find myself struck with a deep focus that lets me complete any task quickly and efficiently without distraction, the way some described adderall to be. Most stimulants do not affect me much, so to find a drug that literally materially improves my functionality is a blessing. The visuals and psychedelic effects are icing on the cake.

5. Etizolam: My major qualm with benzodiazepines (I know its not technically one but judging by effects, it might as well be), is just how heavily they can affect memory for quite a period of time. Etizolam spares me that, being a short lasting experience that is more lucid in my memory than its cousins. The added bonus is that it doesn't leave me in a semi-blackout state for several days like some do (eg. clonazepam). It's useful for sleep, for acute stress and anxiety, for coming off trips, and is honestly pretty fun. I mustn't lose sight of the fact that its apparent relative benevolence is negated if I find myself binging on it recreationally.

6. Ephenidine: Ephenidine is another fairly psychedelic dissociative (see a pattern here?) that has given me my share of interesting experiences. It's a pretty standard experience that stands out for its euhporia, functionality, and deep colorful visuals and hole states. It simply lacks the emotional and cognitive depth of the other two dissociatives on this list so far, but is nonetheless a consistently enjoyable experience.

7. 2C-B-FLY: I only got one taste of this but damn what a good time. This is a drug that I would describe as overwhelmingly fun. The bodyload was a bit rough for parts of it, but no matter, this is a drug that filled me with joviality and unrestrained social capability. My cognitive processes and ability to interact with others was vastly improved, this drug is utilitarian and shows promise for use in social settings. It used to be cheap and readily available but I unfortunately missed my opportunity to acquire more. Oh well.

8. 5-APDB: To be entirely honest, I am not the biggest fan of empathogens. They are undeniably enjoyable, in fact they are the essence of enjoyment. The problem is, that enjoyment is so entirely detached from reality or any sort of pragmatic thought, it is a delusional fantasy that often leaves me feeling a bit silly and foolish in their wake. Also I just get really sappy and talkative and usually make a fool of myself. Nonetheless, I have had great times with this drug. I prefer it to MDMA because it lacks the stimulation and bodyload that MDMA can have sometimes.

9. Deschloroketamine: The first time I tried deschloroketamine I found myself elated, I had found an experience that was very very similar to my sweet golden MXE. There were a few slight differences, ones I considered minor at the time, but they would become glaring with repeated experiments. The main difference is energy level- while MXE is somewhat stimulating, Deschloroketamine destroys you, renders your body weak, impotent, and useless for a long while. While this is no issue while you're in the hole, the comedown is always draining and sluggish. The experience itself is quite enjoyable and euphoric, but the aftereffects are usually pretty rough.

10. DALT: This is a truly unique substsance, though its novelty only gives it a shred of merit. It's fun for casual use, for hanging out with friends, for throwing a relaxing psychedelic blanket on any experience, but it's simply too mild and too short acting to really stand out. It's just a slight taste of what could be a full experience and oftentimes just isn't worth the hassle of smoking it. As it stands, it is mostly just a novelty, but a pretty neat one at that.

11. Memantine: This is another one whose value mostly stems from novelty. It is incredibly long lasting, like multiple days long lasting. It's a marathon experience. While interesting, I'm not sure what merit to grant it, as it is one of the most fundamentally neutral things I have ever felt. It's intensely dissociating and oddly cold and clinical. I'm certain that I would not call it enjoyable or unenjoyable, it just is.

12. 4-HO-DPT: I had such high hopes for this one after what I had read online. This was my holy grail, and when it became available from a major vendor, I was ecstatic. Unfortunately, it turned out not to be up to the hype. Don't get me wrong, it is an interesting and enlightening experience that certainly glows in certain areas, namely psychedelic whimsy and enhanced cognition. But damn the bodyload is something hardcore, and administering it is by far the worst drug administration experience I've had. The chalky powder stings and clumps up in the nose, it smells putrid and the powder fluffs up all through the sinuses and throat, this is followed by intense nausea and overall discomfort. I really wish I could explore this further, but that's such an obstacle for me.

13. 2C-T-7: Similar to the last, this one yielded an incredibly interesting experience that covered a wide range of effects. It seems like this one gave me everything psychedelics could offer in one experience, and unfortunately that included crippling bodyload that lasted throughout the entire experience. Interesting, but once again, there are just major obstacles to me studying it further. The questionable safety profile is also a bit of an issue.

14. 2C-D: This is about as standard as a 2C-x experience could be, as if they were all averaged out into one. This unfortunately also included a rough bodyload, though nowhere near as intense and crippling as others. Overall, it was just short lasting and kind of uninteresting, there is nothing it does that other psychedelics don't do better. The one interesting tidbit was a sort of cognitive enhancement afterglow that lasted well into the next day, which was pretty delightful. It can apparently be used at low doses as a nootropic. I barely had any to play with though.

15. ALD-52: This is another one that held a lot of promise, but ended up being underwhelming in several ways. The main issues were once again, bodyload and just not particularly standing out as an experience in any way that would redeem it from that. It was certainly fun and my time on it was enjoyable, but it didn't stick out in any way that made me yearn to try it again. Suffering the discomfort it made me feel out in the woods wasn't too fun either.

16. ETH-LAD: Same as the last, I've heard most lysergamides are pretty similar and this was only subtly different from ALD-52. It too was rough on the body, and it too wasn't too interesting, although it's visuals were pretty unique. The big issue was that it really stymied social interaction, making everything awkward and really displaying quite the opposite effect to others like 2C-B-FLY. If I ever try this again it'll probably just be alone.

17. 2C-E: Opinion on 2C-E is torn. Shulgin spoke volumes of praise, while others recount their nightmarish and deeply uncomfortable experiences from it. I am apparently of the latter camp. It seems pretty dependent on the individual and consistent for that individual. The bodyload was the major offputting feature of this drug, as it just absolutely ravaged me and left me feeling deeply ill throughout and after the experience. That aside, it was interesting and had some pretty neat and enjoyable features, but in the end it was just too rough on me. I have entertained perhaps trying this one again just because it is so highly praised by some.

18. 5-MeO-DALT: This was just an uncomfortable experience from every angle. Bodyload was uniquely terrible, with nausea and really frequent urination. The experience was just odd, unsettling, and disquieting. The worst part of it though was that it seemed to instill an absolute inability to focus. My thoughts were racing faster than I could possibly maintain and it made for a deeply unsettling night of pacing and stressful discomfort.

19. O-PCE: I have taken this one a good bunch of times, I do not know why. Every time I regret it. This is pure dissociation, pure, debilitating dissociation that just completely wipes me every time, annihilating my functionality and dismantling my ability to do anything. It is long lasting and just completely unrelenting, it holds my head under the water and doesn't let me take a single breath for its entire 3-4 hour peak. There is no focusing or snapping out of it, once you are subjected to this drug you are completely under its control for as long as it desires. If any drug could make me fuck up my life accidentally, it would be this one.

20. Glaucine: And now we reach the bottom of the barrel. This is my absolute least favorite drug, it is responsible for the most irredeemably awful drug experience I have had. Even my out of control nightmare psychedelic experiences have some value to them, this was just a waste of my time and mental energy. This was just a hallucinated depressive episode, where I found myself writhing with discomfort just begging for it to end. It's a nonstandard hallucinogen that doesn't really match the receptor activity of any others, and my god it just sucked all the way through. The bodyload was rough, the mental load was rough, even coming off of it didn't feel entirely good. Just a stressful and entirely unenjoyable substance.

So that's it, that's my list for this year. I excluded a few that were too minor in their effects to really be placed with these other substances. Also, I excluded a few that are certainly powerful substances, but I simply have only had minor experiences so far that are not worth writing. These ones all warrant further exploration at higher doses.
-5-MeO-DMT
-AMT
-2C-iP


Happy new year to you all. Thanks for reading.