Weight: 120 lbs
Dosage: 150 mg ephenidine oral in
gel cap
Setting: My apartment
T0:00-Dosed in gel cap
T0:50-Onset not felt until now.
Was mostly relaxing watching my roommate play videogames, just passing time.
T1:20-Picking up, that rising
sense of dissociative warmth. It feels as though my head is very heavy and sort
of drifting away. I am also very dizzy. My limbs feel like they’re vibrating
away, and it feels like pulses are running through my body like I am a
jellyfish. Visuals begin to manifest on the walls, they are brightly colored
interlocking diamond patterns that warp and ripple. It feels like my fingers
are buzzing and vibrating which is pretty cool.
T1:30-I go outside to the
backyard with my friends. Currently, an old friend from high school is hanging
out at the house with us. He ran into some trouble back in high school and I
haven’t seen him for three years until today. It’s pretty cool to be hanging
out with him again and pretty wild to be tripping in his presence. We all smoke
some weed under the setting sun. Very pleasant and idyllic. The plants are just
starting to come alive. I close my eyes and try to let myself sink into the
mounting headspace. I am greeted by solid and angular geometry in bright
colors, mirroring and bending. It feels like I am being vibrated apart, similar
to MXP. It is like I am a string that is being plucked, only for the intensity
of its vibrations to take it to pieces.
One distinctive open eyed visual
came looking at the sky. I wove a web of twine over my backyard for vines to
grow into some sort of canopy. There were eyespots in the middle of the spaces
in the web, which was a pretty cool effect. I feel as though I am drifting out
of touch with reality, where basic tasks and familiar images become unrecognizable
and inconceivable. Every object we see has a semiotic designation in our minds,
for example you see a car and think of the word “car”, and then all your
thoughts and memories involving cars are triggered (at least that’s how it is
for me). Here though, I see a car, and simply see an object in front of me,
undefined and devoid of any meaning.
T1:45-A heavy peak with intense
time dilation sweeps me up like floodwaters. The scape of open eyed visuals is
that of brightly colored floral patterns overlaying everything. The edges of
these patterns fractallize into infinite complexity, becoming variegated and
frilly. Things then begin to paradoxically reduce in complexity, making the
world appear pixelated, or reduced to polygons like early 3d-rendering. It
feels like I am sinking and going numb. I feel like I can stand up and be
functional if I want to, the headspace is fairly lucid. I just choose not to,
it simply isn’t preferable in this mindset.
I am playing music from my
laptop, my roommate and my friend have a ukulele and small keyboard and are
playing accompaniments to it. It is a warm euphoric space of camaraderie and
pleasant bonding. I close my eyes and am awestruck with the intensity and
complexity of the visual world that followed.
The first thing that manifests is
a teal and magenta afterimage, a snapshot of the very last thing I saw before
closing my eyes. This image lingers briefly, then begins to melt and
deconstruct, warp and drag and blur until it is an unrecognizable mess of
prismatic geometry. Suddenly it is all swept away by images of vast landscapes
and realms. These images are reminiscent of the anatomy of
invertebrates-tentacles and gelatinous protuberances, the repeated or branching
forms of gills and filters and appendages, all in fluid pulsing motion, all in
a spectacular array of rainbow or pastel colors. In some instances, there
appears to be a vast polychrome city of soft and drooping forms, like towers of
melted ice cream and putty. The images begin to repeat and fractallize, until
it is repeated in an infinite field before me, each manifestation of the image
overlapping the others, like a vast screen of shingles or scales, each scale
with an image on it. The entire field of repeated images begins to ripple and
pulse.
T2:00-The edges of my vision
begin to ripple and fractallize into that same variegated pattern that appeared
at the edges of the floral patterns. It is as though my entire field of vision
has taken the form of a leaf or flower with intricately jagged edges. With my
eyes closed, I am bombarded with more biomorphic images. Geometry forms into
branches, rapidly replicating into fractal infinity, a beautiful representation
of the recursion and replication inherent to all life forms. A great iridescent
serpent slithers through a great pulsing rainbow landscape of mountains and
hills. The hallucinatory visual field splits into segments, and it feels as
though great segmented creatures are pulsing and thrashing against me. It feels
like a rush, like cold water is pouring down my face. Everything in motion
seems to leave behind 3 dimensional tracers, almost as if the “essence” or “soul”
of all things in motion is trailing behind them, or perhaps it’s a representation
of their kinetic energy when my vision is not bounded by linear time. This is
present with both open and closed eyes. It feels like sounds are cushioning
everything and outlining and encapsulating everything.
My laptop dies and I eagerly
demonstrate that I can snap back into functionality by standing up, carrying it
into the house, going upstairs and grabbing my charger, plugging it in, walking
back outside, and plugging in the outdoor lights. I feel like I am melting and
sinking when I sit still, but in motion I am acutely aware of my movement and
momentum. This entire trip feels “pulsey”, “tentacley”, and “tendrilly” for
lack of better or real words. None of this is remotely frightening or
distressing, rather it is all quite whimsical and fantastic and fills me with
wonderment.
T2:45-It feels as though I have
very suddenly come down, I am at a very functional level of sobriety both
mentally and physically. My short term memory feels a bit stunted, but aside
from that the drug only lingers in a pleasant glow, a numb warmth in my body, a
gentle buzz in my head, and calm visuals playing on the walls. I play
videogames with my friend and roommate.
T4:30-I smoke a lot of weed. It
kicks things back up. I feel a weight in my head that I often get from
dissociatives, and it feels like a numbing energy is pulsing through my
extremities. The visuals pick up and play again, and my short term memory seems
to get tired and take a break. The only closed eyed visual I recall from this
point was an image of a 3d rendered robotic arm, jerking back and forth and
flailing about.
T5:20-I walk my friend to the
train station. I am plenty lucid to be in public now. Being outside and walking
around is exhilarating. My equilibrium has returned enough that I am not
stumbling or walking off balance. Socializing feels distant and weird but still
pleasant in a whimsical way. The entire time it feels as though some sort of
pressure is being exerted on me, permeating my flesh and leaking into me in a
stream of colors. This is very pleasant. It feels as though this pressure is
moving my limbs, driving me along and giving me momentum.
T5:45-I return home. I go up to
my room and relax. I still feel a strong glow.
T7:40-I go to sleep. I am still
feeling the drug somewhat when I go to bed, in the form of a dissociative
warmth and a psychedelic headspace.
Conclusion: I love this stuff. It
is like dissociative 2C-B or LSD. It is easily the most psychedelic and most
visual dissociative I have taken, and I love it! The visuals are spectacular,
colorful, beautiful, complex and organic. The headspace is fairly psychedelic,
stimulating abstract and alien thought, and only such a psychedelic headspace
could let one integrate so easily into the absurd visual space. Yet it is still
very lucid, and you can easily be basically functional if you need to (walking,
talking etc). Otherwise, it’s very warm
and social, with a hint of empathogenic qualities, which is quite outstanding
considering how emotionally dead dissociatives can be. Some of the sheer
strangeness of the visual and headspace was reminiscent of DXM. Physically, it
is neither stimulating nor sedating. It has a warm melting feeling with some of
the rush that comes from MXE, which overall feels really nice. I’m not sure if
it has inherent euphoria or whether I was just giddy over the absurdity and
whimsy of the experience. Definitely one of my favorites. One thing to note-
similar to psychedelics it has a fast and hard tolerance buildup, weakening the
effects of all dissociatives for about a week after use.
just wanna say I love this blog <3 lots of weird shit on here man/girl. Think we'd be good friends. stay safe
ReplyDeleteaw thank you ^.^
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