Age:20
Weight: 120 lbs
Dosage: 10 mg 3-MeO-PCP Intranasal, 10 mg 2C-B Intranasal
Setting: My friend's house, Graffiti Pier, my apartment
T0:00-3-MeO-PCP insufflated in
class. I’m goin exploring with some friends right after and we had limited
sunlight. I wanted to already be goin hard when we went out. So I duck into the
bathroom and rail it.
T0:30-Class is over and I am at
my friends house. I am definitely feeling dissociated, but so far it is only a
physical effect, a warm numbness and a pleasant body high. We’re planning our
journey out. We smoke a little and hang out and prepare. The other people dose
with various substances, mostly either 2C-B, 3-MeO-PCP, or a combination. I
decide to split 20 mg of 2C-B with a friend and insufflate it. The pain hits as
usual and is extremely unpleasant. However, because I am already on
dissociatives, it ends up not being too bad and fades faster than usual. I
almost immediately feel my body high get potentiated, like my numbness has just
burst into an aura of colorful flames that are floating my essence through the
ceiling. Visuals begin almost immediately, subtle and exquisitely colorful
patterns on surfaces.
T0:50-We go outside and depart. I
feel like I am inside still. The sky is incomprehensible and irrelevant. Could there really exist a void, and aether so
huge? Nah. It’s a trick. The entire world feels far away, I feel like I am
navigating it in third person, I feel like I am navigating it in a bubble. My
body moves on autopilot, and my depth perception is fucked beyond any degree of
salvation. We hop into cars and depart. The car ride is a blast, I am zooming
around through changing settings with little sense of self. It is so surreal to
see so much of the world briefly flitting by, it feels like I am just in a pod
with screens showing a strange world in motion. I am so dissociated that I
really cannot connect any sense of motion I am feeling with the movement of the
car. What a time.
T1:00-We arrive at our
destination and go exploring. I am so fucked up. I am so stimulated. I feel
like I could do anything, that I could run for miles, that my body has attained
a super status that it has never achieved before. My limbs feel ready to
explode from my body. I feel incredibly lightweight and floaty. There are other
people here, it is honestly really hard to see and I need confirmation later
that these blurry figures I saw were real. They are doing some sort of fashion
photoshoot. I piece this together later. In the moment, seeing these people
with strange clothes and cameras just comes off as an absurd manifestation of
an increasingly irrational subconscious. I have to climb a tree with several
embedded railroad spikes as grips. I have no idea how I did this without dying.
We are now in a high up place. Once again I have no idea how I didn’t stumble
and die. We smoke a joint and talk about stuff and watch the sunset. It’s
beautiful. I feel like I am in such a perfect place in this moment, that I am
in such a perfect place in my life, that so many forces came together to create
the events that led me to being right here, in this moment, on these drugs. My
depth perception is still fucked. A distant object appears to be really close
and not too large. It later turned out to be absolutely immense. The surface of
the water is pretty and very trippy to look at, but eventually the depth
perception distorts so much that I can no longer tell how far away the surface
is or where the surface is relative to other objects.
T1:45-We climb down from where we
were and walk amongst the ruins of a large concrete pier. It is mesmerizing,
there is so much intricate and beautiful graffiti. The 2C-B does that thing
where everything looks like graffiti again. It’s hard to tell what’s actually
there and what isn’t. We hang around for about 2 more hours. Everyone is
talking about a lot of things. Some of it deep, some of it shallow, some light,
some heavy, just a lot of conversation and interaction. The mental energy being
poured into this makes the air buzz. There really is nothing to report for the
rest of the trip. The surface of the river was spectacular to look at still, as
was the sky. I am incredibly manic, I feel like all the inane shit I’m saying
is intelligent or insightful or immensely profound, I feel like I am smart and
have good ideas. I want to share them all, spill them all on the floor for
everyone to see and to receive praise for them. Based on what others are
saying, I feel like I have different ideas and perspectives than them, and I am
so eager to share, I have this feeling like sharing a different perspective is
inherently insightful and profound and that I will be praised for it. Of course
this only applies if what I say is actually insightful or good or interesting.
Whelp. Everyone else is heavily altered. I’m not sure what they thought of what
I was saying. The hallucinatory state manifested in projecting reactions,
thoughts, and mindsets on others. I felt like I could read their minds. In
reality I was probably just making shit up and making myself believe it. Either
way, it became a feedback loop to route imagined praise and respect back to myself
after bouncing thoughts off of them. Or maybe they did find what I said
insightful and interesting. It’s hard to know, I am so out of touch with people
and emotions and I am naturally inclined to assume the worst about myself.
T4:00-We arrive back at the
friend’s house where we started. 2C-B visuals are still lightly playing on
surfaces. I show one of the people there who I have never met before my
sketchbook. We have a nice conversation about our interests and find we have
some thoughts in common. He praises me a great deal on my artwork and I am very
very grateful for his kindness, and I am warmed with the thought that something
I created elicited positive thoughts in him. This is hard to deny, he takes pictures
of my work, its really hard to knock myself down from this like I always do. Of
course in the moment, I could never knock myself down, I was on such a manic
ego trip. But even in retrospect I can’t, that is nice, it really is.
T4:30 I have to leave though to
meet a friend who I had planned earlier in the day to meet tonight. When I meet
her I feel so prideful, so vain, so important and special, so interesting and
wise and insightful. I’m sure it was a breath of fresh air from my usual
depressed and self-sabotaging self, but I can imagine it was scary to witness me
in such a radically different yet equally deluded mindset. Visuals have for the
most part died down. Depth perception is still fucked, and I still have that
dissociative floaty feeling.
T6:00-Back to baseline.
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