Age:20
Weight: 120 lbs
Dose: 20 mg of 2C-B Intranasal, 50 mg of
MXE Intranasal
Setting: My bedroom
Set: I was pretty deep in
depression and feeling wild and confused… teen angst failed relationship
bullshit so petty but so upsetting etc etc etc
I get impulsive w/ drugs when I’m depressed, I got home and just wanted
to do something, something, my usual was dex but I felt a bit nauseous already
and didn’t want to deal with that. I usually plan out my trips in advance but
this time I just wanted to go for something. I remember a friend telling me
2C-B and MXE went together really well, so I decided to go for that one. They
were both very fun and euphoric drugs for me so I figured mixing them would
cheer me up.
T0:00-MXE insufflated
T0:40-stumble around house a bit,
begin to feel the MXE really coming on so decide it’s time to dose the 2C-B. Being
on a dissociative with anesthetic properties, the pain from insufflating 2C-B
is substaintally more manageable.
T0:50-Really feeling them
coalesce, the world feels like its shifting out of its frame into a more
colorful one. Feel nauseous as hell and go to the bathroom. Ends up being ok,
but already can hear all the sounds around me reverberate and recede, like they’re
all coming from the other end of a tunnel.
T1:00-Every surface looks like
its covered in colorful graffiti, scribbly handstyles and big cool looking pieces.
This is cool as hell, I feel so full of energy. I close my eyes and sink into
incredibly colorful and spectacular CEV’s, the only description could be
glorious and divine, like a blast of sun coming through stained glass, like a
rainbow reflected on polished gold or the grace of the sky, it was immense
geometric shapes and structures, humbling in their size, I felt like a
miniscule speck flitting among these expressions of pure beauty and grace, this
was great.
T1:20-I felt like I was struck
with a bolt of energy, I arched my back I ran in place I just wanted to and
could do anything I was so euphoric I was so spectacularly explosive with
energy. I felt the fire of life, it was the same feeling a super high dose of
acid gave me- I just had so much life in me I was a miraculous being made of
self replicating molecules, and the innate duty to exist was born from that.
Survival was the most important thing one could do, in the face of entropy that
crushes all. Etc. etc I wanted to run and scream. I went downstairs. The stairs
turned into colorful rectangles splitting in every direction. I clung to the
rail and rain down as fast as I could. I see my roommate and shout something
silly and incoherent to him and then run into the backyard. I feel like an
animal I run and jump and go wild back there.
T1:50-I need to turn up the
ritualistic ridiculousness of this. I put on the freaky mask I made and wrap
myself shirtless in a soft blanket. I run outside after shoutin something
freaky to my roommate again. I ask him if he wants to watch me go wild or
something. I get to the backyard and blast music and shake and writhe and dance
in the most absolutely absurd way possible, I had absolutely no qualms with
being ridiculous I was alive and that was all that mattered, we had a
conversation that I vaguely remember, I said personal stuff to him I think and
likewise, I remember curling on the ground and shouting “I wanna die dude” a
lot, and bemoaning the fact that I can’t always feel this way. I feel like I’m
in my own little sanctuary, that none of the world exists around me.
T2:20-We go back inside. I curl
up on the couch in my mask. Weeeee I am still shaking like wild, I still see
graffiti everywhere along with other stripey patterns. My mom texts me, completely
out of the blue, with “what are you doing?”. I am going back home to see them
tomorrow but its 11 PM and this has no context, which realllly freaks me out. I
start getting super paranoid. Was I shouting in the backyard? Was she somewhere
within earshot, spying on me? (this isn’t beyond her which is what really gave
this some credence, she’s done things similar before). I just don’t reply and
decide Ill just respond when I’m down but im still pretty freaked out. I still
just have so much pent up energy. I want to scream so badly. I ask my roommates
if I can scream. I scream at the top of my lungs, throat shredding screams.
First I do this in the hallway upstairs, but decide that isn’t good. I run to
the basement, lie on the ground mask and all, and just let loose with shrieks,
screams of life or anguish or something. I realized later how obnoxious this
must’ve been.
T2:50-I go back to my room and
ride out the spectacular visuals for longer. More of the same rainbow stuff,
defies description, no words can give credit to their beauty and the beauty of
being lost in them. It was an experience that warrants a lot of words but it’d
honestly just get tedious to describe them/I don’t recall them very much. I
lied here with this for awhile.
T3:30-I go back downstairs. I am
starting to come down from the 2C-B at least. Still feel numb and spacey from
the MXE. Sit downstairs and watch half of American Psycho with my roommate.
T6:00-Mostly down, only with
afterglow now.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletewhat's afterglow?
ReplyDeleteIt's the sorta residual "high" feeling after one comes down from the main effects of a trip, it's not very impairing or strong, just a sort of "glow", like an ember glowing after a fire
ReplyDelete