2C-B + 3-MeO-PCE

Age: 21

Weight: 120 lbs

Dosage: 25 mg 3-MeO-PCE + 8 mg 2C-B Intranasal

Setting: My apartment

T0:00- Dose both drugs, simply because I wanted to be revelrous for the night. I had just finished a punishing round of exams and wanted to get altered hang out with my roommate. I really did intend to turn up just a little, just enough to still be able to socialize, but I severely miscalculated it seems. The pain of insufflation is immediate and immense, it's the acerbic, biting, acute harshness of the 2C-B + the long slow burn stinging discomfort of 3-MeO-PCE. Not enjoyable at all. 

T0:05- Coming up hard and fast, much more so than expected. The sting and the drip become too much for me and I have to go purge. After that, I go and smoke a blunt with my roommate in the backyard. 

T0:10- While hanging out in the backyard I begin to realize things may get a bit out of hand. The blunt was definitely not a wise decision in this state. I suddenly notice my heart racing and body being shaken in all sorts of contorted ways. I feel like I am oddly proportioned- a longer than normal arm here, a shorter leg there, a shrunken corner of the torso and a head that's too large. My visual field is being overtaken by exploding and exponentially reproducing fronds, feathers, and fractals. My heart sinks into my guts as I realize that I am in for more of a ride than I had expected.

T0:30- I go inside and the walls look like they've been decorated with glowing Mesoamerican carvings, great swirling glyphs and blocky faces, formed from pulsing polychromatic neon lines. I realize I will not be able to just hang out with my roommate as I had planned and retreat to the relative darkness of my room to face the unfettered fury of this experience.
In my room I am greeted by the metallic pulsing swirling alien visuals that have seeped into and consumed my mind. The walls are adorned with spiraling swirling blocky patterns that are in turn adorned with hundreds of steely lifeless glowing eyes. Mysterious humanoid figures begin to form in these patterns, though they are still restricted to existing on the wall, in only two dimensions. The floor begins to fracture into interlocking rectangles that levitate and hover around me like a swarm of flies, light cascading down beneath them. I feel like I am surrounded by looming figures, silhouettes that are backlit by a brilliant hallucinated light. My room quite obviously does not appear as my room anymore. It has become an alien temple, the floor hovering in pieces above a pool of shimmering light, the walls consumed by flowing and self transforming patterns and glyphs, some extruding towards me, others retreating into a vast glowing void. My ceiling has become shiny and black and vaulted and it soars dizzyingly skywards. I feel alone in this sanctuary, like this hallowed place is sheltering me with its lustrous purity. I cannot comprehend any space outside of my transformed room, I am unable to even entertain the thought that it is possible to leave this space, but that's okay, I am safe here. Though honestly I do not know if I am inside or outside. I begin to feel a crawling sensation, like great neon snakes are coalescing from whatever material composes my bed and are slithering their way up towards my heart. I begin to sink into the bed, and then into my own chest it seems. My own ribs tower over me on either side like great lurking monoliths, clawing at the sky. Suddenly it feels like I am being pelted by a clattering dissociative rain as my entire field of vision is consumed by a cascade of tessellated hands and faces. Soon this pattern is interrupted by the interjection of pastel pink iridescent centipedes, slithering across the stoic yet delicate tessellations.
I blink and am returned to my room, but everything is made of polished black stone. Every surface is laced with glowing and pulsing vitreous red vein-like patterns, angular and sharp like the circuits on a circuit board.
I again get this feeling that I do not know whether I am inside or outside. I again get this feeling that I am being enclosed, cut off, isolated in my own private chamber. A retinue of mysterious figures surround and tend to me, as the flashing veins pulse more excitedly. The patterns of the glowing red veins and the walls begin to flow towards me like a river of lava.
As the room closes in on me, I begin to sense smaller figure surrounding me- a small crew of mysterious animated figurines, made of the same black stone as the rest of the room, adorned with teal pulsing veins. These faceless beings seem to be redirecting the red veins of the room towards me, an effort to imbue me with their mysterious energy. I look down at myself and I too am hewn from this black stone and embelished with these illuminated veins. I am a great neon golem, I feel like I am a god in this world with a dedicated cult of beings lending me their faith. The attend me in pious frenzy, trying to empower me and elevate me with their esoteric prayers. They seem to have summoned me and infused me with this energy for some purpose, although what that purpose is is not clear. Every now and then it feels as though the pulses overwhelm me, and I am overcome with pure and unrelenting dissociative energy. When this happens I feel like I am sinking into whatever surface I am on, falling into a great numbing hole. I can always snap myself out of it though.
It is now that I begin to get a sense of why they have summoned me. Out beyond the reaches of my glowing cocoon, my own personal temple, I sense it. At the very border of the light and dark it lurks, an ominous feeling, an antithesis to the brilliant light, an equally brilliant darkness. The lights around me shine ever bolder in protest, illuminating the vast stretches of a grand citadel that was previously obscured from me. I sit at its center, anticipating the slithering darkness that has come to devour it.  Wherever I cast my gaze, the lights intensify and shoot further out into the dark, its amorphous yet intricate and horrific Geigeresque textures retreating before the glow. Soon the energy and light overwhelms me and it feels as though my mind has shattered into a mess of shards, each shard representing some piece of my existence- little blocks of memories, of personalities and beliefs and indescribable feelings. From the light comes a parade of beings who seem to have developed to interact with these shards, each one unique and specialized to properly interpret and process a different aspect of myself.
I feel burnt, helpless, unable to react or respond. My mind no longer intact, it is difficult to keep track of time or anything really. It is as if I blacked out for a bit. My memory begins to fizzle to an ethereal nothing, soon accompanied by my surroundings. Everything becomes more vague and the lights begin to mesh together and muddy one another and cancel each other out as the experience begins to slowly slip away from me, like I am being drained of my neon blood. My mind seem to be latching to these patterns and visuals still, in some desperate attempt to cling to the place where I was so revered, but it eventually recedes beyond my reach.
I blink as I come to in my room. I question myself as to why I did this on a Tuesday. I still feel very wobbly and everything looks loose and shaky, as if it's all been carefully suspended on an oil slick on the surface of some flat still water, and the slightest disturbance on my part will ripple and dismantle my surroundings. I am still and in awe. There are still figures looming in the corners of my vision. Any straight lines i see collapse into diagonals or zigzags.

T1:30- I am sort of in shock from how the last hour transpired. My memory from this point forth is somewhat foggy, and it seems I only took notes during the peak of the experience. I recall still feeling wobbly at this point with walking being very difficult. The visuals have died down substantially, though there are still light flashing patterns on the walls and I still see tracers with all movement. I am down enough by this point that I can rejoin my roommate downstairs.

T3:00- Most of the effects have subsided besides a warm glowing euphoria that wraps around my limbs and pumps gentle energy into me. This is exceedingly pleasant. The light visuals have continued at the same level for the better part of the last hour and a half. I am hanging out with my roommate, we have been watching things on the TV because I am still too physically dissociated to play video games.

T7:00-I still feel faint and wobbly, with light visuals still persisting. I feel warm and somewhat wired. I know sleep will not come easily, so I take ~2 mg of etizolam and that allows me to calm down and sink into a slumber.

I was not at all expecting the intensity of this trip, but I am glad I experienced it. It was remarkable for how separated I was from reality, yet how clear and intact my memory remained for the better part of the peak. The esoteric effects, the mysterious figures, the looming darkness and the glorious citadel and the odd disjointed storyline all came across like a particularly powerful and surreal dream. 

Nitrous Oxide

At long last, nitrous oxide had come into my possession. I had a 50 pack of whipped cream chargers and a dispenser at my disposal.
Several trials were attempted. The first 6 were all done in the same night in the span of 2 hours. Other accounts were more spontaneous and less controlled.

Trial 1:
1 Canister
Dim room
Time elapsed: 1 minute 10 seconds
Other substances: none
Barely felt anything, a shallowness of breath and a bit of a throbbing head rush with some throbbing in my limbs. First time noting the sort of dry, sterile, sickly sweet flavor of the gas.

Trial 2
Quantity: 2 canisters
Setting: dim room
Time elapsed: forgot to record
Other substances: none

Much stronger effect this time, full on dissociation for a brief period, numbness not only in the extremities but all over the body. Visual effects were a sort of morphing and swirling of surroundings. The effect was primarily felt in the body-an intense throbbing dissociation. Rather than the sort of fade-out dissociation that other dissociatives give, this came in intense pulses. More grounded and centered than other dissociatives, leaves a feeling of dry numbness in the skin for a bit after.

Trial 3
Quantity: 2 canisters
Setting: dark room
Time elapsed: 6:22
Other substances none

Done in the dark. Was even more intense this time, a full body dissociation, spitting and pulsing in my face, none of the dizziness or gradual numbness of other dissociatives. It was just cold and sudden full body anethesia, like I am being dipped repeatedly into liquid nitrogen. Not many auditory effects, though I feel very separated from myself. There is a persistant throbbing numbness in the head and in the extremities. The visuals present as concentric designs, swirling and warping with my throbbing heartbeat.
It is as though one eye is throbbing at a time and each throb distorts the vision from that particular eye. My skin feels dry and numb. Slight nausea and a bit of discomfort in my head. As it fizzles out, I get random pangs of numbness across my body. For about 10 minutes afterwards I feel somewhat lethargic, movement is labored and uncoordinated.

Trial 4
Quantity: 3 canisters
Setting: dark room
Time elapsed:  8:42
Other substances: none

This time around I instantly became very hot and sweaty, it was a warm gushing dissociation that shot right into me. I was rendered entirely immobile and felt like a statue. Auditory effects were a sort of clipping of the sounds I was hearing, as if every other frame of the sound was missing. Everything also sounded deeper. I felt like I was being sucked really quickly into the core of my body, a place where it was very warm and wet. I was being pulled in my pulsing, gasping throes.
My vision is swirling and strobing and pulsing, I feel like some great soft being has attempted to squeeze the life out of me. The darkness around me is rippling and pulsing and shaking and I am rippling and pulsing and shaking, this was a crushing sucking shrinking dissociation. As it fades out, I feel random pangs of numbness as I come down along with a distinct sort of nausea. I feel the numbness in my tongue especially. Every now and hten it seems like  the world twitches, or I briefly have a shift of perspective. There are also occasional waves of tinnitus. It feels like there something is drumming on he air around me.
Coming down, about 15 minutes later, I can't help but smile


Trial 5
Quantity: 2 canisters
Setting: dark room
Time elapsed: 14:52
Other substances: Cannabis

This time I consumed a bowl of cannabis prior to the experiment.
Effects were prolonged substantially and imbued with an incredible pulsing euphoria travelling up and down my body an encasing me like a cocoon. The numbness this time around was incredibly warm and ripply, it felt like I was sinking into a vibrating bath that took away all feeling. This pulsing was most pleasurable in my extremities, I felt like I was being massaged by great warm and soft yet crushing hands. Sounds were mostly unaltered and the visuals were synesthetic. With eyes open, there were great colorful concentric circles before me, like grainy ripples on the surface of a lake during a particularly vibrant sunset. 5 minutes on and I am still in a bit of a daze. Closing my eyes feels colorful and euphoric with soft angular visuals. Felt longer than it actually was, like time slowed down. Much more pleasurable this way. I can feel my skull and I feel like my toes are fading away. This eventually passes as I come back to baseline. Still that cold, clammy, dry feeling on my skin.

Miscellaneous  further trials-

Trial 6
Quantity: 2 canisters
Setting: dark room
Time elapsed: not measured
Other substances: Cannabis

I was very very stoned at this point, having smoked a blunt and taken 2 hits from the gravity bong. A friend and I decided to top it off with some nitrous.
For this particularly experience, I line up a particular song, "Endless Fantasy" by anamanaguchi. This is important because this song is incredibly energetic and stimulating, and it crescendos in the most glorious way about 30 seconds in, just enough time for the come up of nitrous.
We turned the lights out and blasted off. Just as expected, the song peaked just as we were. The feeling of overwhelming, all-consuming euphoria I felt at that moment is incomparable to any other substance I've consumed, even substances 'of pleasure' like empathogens. Everything that was bad was washed away like dirt in a warm shower, the possibility of anything feeling bad was discarded and left to wither. Nothing could bring me down in those 2 minutes. The music was pulsing upwards through my being, wrapping around me, forming an ethereal shell in the shape of the void that was once occupied by my body. These tendrils pulsed and seethed with the most spectacular prismatic light, a pure aesthetic pleasure to behold. This accompanied a synesthetic flanging of the music. Everything was strobing and each blast from the strobe was like being kicked by a great soft foot into a great soft mattress. I was smiling ear to ear, but this wasn't just some abstract happiness, I began viewing all of my life's circumstances with uncharacteristic and unshakable optimism. This feeling would unfortunately fade as the experienced faded out. I was left smiling, in total awe, still unable to move even after the nitrous had fizzled out, completely struck by what I had just experienced.

Trial 7
Quantity: 2 canisters
Setting: dark room
Time elapsed: Not measured
Other substances: 4-AcO-MET, Cannabis

This time I was in the pleasurable and delightful throes of one of my favorite psychedelics, 4-AcO-MET. I had heard much about the experience of stacking nitrous on psychedelics and was excited to try. The same friend and comrade from the last excerpt was also joining me here.
We turned the lights out and prepared our balloons. Already in the darkness, my visuals were much more apparent, great swirling feathers pulsing in ocean currents, radiating rainbows from within. I sucked in my balloon. As the sweet gas overtook me, I was blasted forth.
It did not seem to contribute much of its nature to the trip, only intensity. The only distinctly "nitrous" effects I noticed were the auditory flanging and physical dissociation. Otherwise, it was as if I had upped my dose of the 4-AcO-MET exponentially. The visuals I had seen before came out in full force, blossoming into a spectacular and overwhelming synesthetic garden of color and stimulation. The euphoria noted from last time wasn't present, perhaps due to the music choice. The visuals were kaleidoscopic and all encompassing, radiating outwards at all times from the focal center of my field of vision. They constantly appeared as though they were zooming in on me or approaching/shifting extremely close to my face. The ride down was gentle and the kaleidoscopic tendrils and geometrics slowly shifted into the peripheries of my vision before fading altogether. The experience was jarring, but in a pleasurable way. Of note is that the duration did not seem particularly extended in this state, though the progression of the trip was profound and exciting.

Trial 8
Quantity: 2 canisters
Setting: backyard
Time elapsed: Not measured
Other substances: 4-AcO-MET, Cannabis, DMT

By this time, later on in the night from the previous trial, we had consumed more cannabis and also some leftover DMT from my roommate who had smoked some by himself earlier in the night. The effects of the DMT were negligible at best, and that was immediately followed by some nitrous balloons.
This time, we were in my backyard. Someone next door was playing a fighting game extremely loudly by their window or something, so our soundtrack this time was the ambient neighborhood sounds. When we inhaled, a light drizzle had begun, the sky above was laden with mist that caught the ambient city lights to make the whole night sky glow a milky cold yellow. As we inhaled, it seemed like the world itself was being influenced by the pulses of dissociative energy that were pummeling me, as if the leaves and raindrops were shaking from these brain ripples. The fighting game became a fascinating piece of stimulus, as the grunts of each character began to flang and echo into oblivion, acutely amplifying and emphasizing what was a nearly imperceptible ambient sound when we began. The leaves above me seem to have separated into red and blue ghost images that dance and ripple alongside them, like snowflakes sticking together and being tossed about by the breeze. The sensory effects of this trial were sublime, some of the most fascinating auditory and visual stimuli I have experienced. Gazing upon intricate and detailed things outside at night is a delightful activity in this state, as they seem to exist merely for my aesthetic pleasure, presenting their primordial order and prismatic beauty humbly for my lascivious consumption. The flanging sounds were absolutely most apparent this time around, it seems they manifest the best as alterations of whatever ambient noise is around. This experienced passed somewhat quickly relative to the others.

3-HO-PCE

Age: 21

Weight: 120 lbs

Dosage: 10 mg Intranasal + 10 mg Intranasal (@T1:00)

Setting: My apartment

T0:00- Dosed Intranasally, it has the same acrid petroleum flavor as 3-MeO-PCE, but does not sting at all. 

T0;14- Begin to feel the onset of the experience. This manifests as a sort of lightheadedness.

T0:30- I am simultaneously feeling heavy and light, with a slight tingling numbness in my extremities. No other effects noted as of now, I definitely feel altered, but just barely. 

T1:00- I am still not feeling very much at all. There is a sense of mental dissociation there, but it's faint and elusive. I decide to redose with another 10 mg. At this point I am noticing open eyed visuals in the form of faint dark and light horizontal bands flashing across my field of vision.

T1:30- I decide to go outside and smoke a joint I had rolled beforehand. I lost the joint among my bedsheets but find myself perfectly capable of locating it again, indicating that I am not impaired to any meaningful degree. I go outside and relax in the bathtub we have stationed back there. I smoke the joint and sink into the ambient noises of the neighborhood.

T1:40- The experience feels as though its picked up substantially. Interestingly enough, the physical dissociation does not extend beyond a numbness of my extremities. There is no wobbliness or hallucinatory sense of motion or loss of body, I am still quite corporeally grounded. I feel like I have been suddenly separated from the world, subtly and stealthily, as though a rug has been quickly and quietly pulled out from under me. I am now floating in my own bubble, separated by some indescribable barrier from a world I can still sense, a world I can still see and hear as it bustles around me. It is as if a cold and sterile scalpel has made a cut so thin and clean that it has rended reality apart and left me partitioned in my own private space.

The open eyed visuals now manifest as flashing faint diamond patterns, especially visible against lights, like that of my laptop.  It looks like two bulges are pulsing on either side of my field of vision, the same sort of peripheral shadows one may see when they rub the corner of their eye. The close eyed visuals are almost like video clips, vivid and clear, built from my memories of the day- of the may day protests I witnessed in the city that morning, the masses of people and signs and banners and the faceless black bloc and the energy of people in resistance. I feel like my face is drooping and melting in a most surreal and ethereal manner, like tentacles are hanging down from it, this is not so much of a physical sensation as it is some odd discrepancy in my normal perception.

T2:00- I begin feeling a sort of warm, sweaty, moist graininess that I feel from dissociatives, like all of my flesh has been replaced with wet sand and that the interstices between these grains and between them and my skin form numb voids from which a feeling of very shallow anesthesia is derived. Indeed, there is not much feeling in my fingertips. I still do not feel acutely physically dissociated, and with sufficient pressure, this anesthesia is overcome. I am very couchlocked, not in the incapacitating manner instilled by dissociatives like ketamine, but more in the sense that I just really really don't want to move. Stillness feels like my body's natural state. I am quite lucid and clearheaded despite the strong mental dissociation disconnecting me from my environment. I can think coherently and cogently, though the world is instilled with some indescribable "weirdness". There is a buzzing in my head and everything feels grainy to the touch, like I am roughly vibrating.

T2:15- The feeling of sandiness has become more marked and apparent. My head feels as though it is pulsing and sliding around, like it has broken free of its moorings in a windstorm. It physically feels as though my head is sinking inwards 3-dimensionally, like there is a black hole at the center of my brain. It feels as though a band has been tied tightly around my skull and is squeezing my thoughts closer together. My movement is light and liberated and my every action carries extra momentum, like my extremities are heavy and my limbs are light. The sense of separation has manifested as everything feeling ethereal and drifting around me, though despite all this, the experience is still quite mild and I do not feel acutely impaired or incapacitated in any way.

T3:00- I smoke some more cannabis. I feel warm and weird, my body feels like it is made of fuzzy gelatin and my tongue feels numb.The "bubble" I have been contained in for the duration of the experience is reinforced. It feels like there are a series of concentric spheres around me, pulsing, vibrating, and most importantly, keeping me separate. This separation is now not only a separation from the world around me, but is now a separation from my normal self. I feel as if I have quietly changed into a different person, like this dissociative has spread through my mind like a plague and I didn't notice until it had fully taken hold. It has stealthily and carefully assassinated me and replaced my former self with a new self, constructed from half formed memories and odd semblances of human thought. I feel emotionally flat and unempathetic to a disturbing degree. I feel as though I am missing some human essence, that I have been replaced with an artificial humanity that falls directly in the depths of the uncanny valley. I still cannot entirely articulate how I was different, I just was. I must be wary with who I interact with while on this substance, as I may behave in uncharacteristic ways. I notice this in conversation with some people, though they don't call me out I find myself responding in ways that I would not normally. I feel uninhibited in what I say and what thoughts I form, an implication that my normal state is inhibited by some forms of empathy or humanity. I am an alien trapped inside a sphere, a body snatcher and a mannequin. 

T3:30- Looking back on the experience at this point, I feel as though I have had amnesia for the past few hours, or that the past few hours have been a distant memory. When sober I would later realize that I had a decent recollection of the experience, though taking notes certainly helped jog my memory for the sake of writing about it.

T4:00- I feel like I am coming down now. I only really feel that same faintness and numbness in my extremities and that sensation of tightness wrapped around my head.

T4:30- Mostly back to baseline, though my head still feels heavy. At this point I smoke more cannabis and find myself rocketed back into the thick of the cognitive aspect of the experience. I begin to ascribe deep importance to all sorts of minor stimuli I am being subjected to. I find myself constantly getting distracted and falling into super deep focus on each distraction, only to get distracted again. The headspace at this point is potently psychedelic and is reminiscent of other "psychedelic" dissociatives, though there are no accompanying visuals or sensory effects. I read through news stories and vividly imagine the events surrounding each one, creating detailed and emotionally compelling narratives in my head, empathizing with each character in each story. Perhaps this sudden hallucinated empathy is me coming back into myself, to compensate for the total flatness I was feeling before.

T7:00- Back to baseline now. I go to sleep.

Conclusion: This dissociative holds value for its novelty, though I did not find it particularly useful. The near total lack of physical effects was interesting, as was the all consuming cognitive dissociation. It was not physically stimulating, but was quite mentally stimulating. The sense of disconnection from the world and from myself was stark and would have been startling had I not sunken into it so gradually. The sensory effects were mild and nondescript. Overall this is an odd drug, though I really do not see any way I could utilize it in the future, whether it be for introspection or for social settings. I would hardly call this a dissociative in fact, it is it's own unique and totally novel sort of alteration, though not one that I am eager to revisit. I would most compare the headspace to O-PCE, dull, neutral, and emotionless, though as I mentioned, without physical effects.

Etizolam + Clonazepam + DPH + Gabapentin + Hydroxyzine + 3-MeO-PCP + Caffeine

Age: 21

Weight: 120 lbs

Dosage: 

~5 mg Etizolam sublingual

.5 mg Clonazepam sublingual

180 mg Caffeine oral

75 mg DPH oral

1500 mg Gabapentin oral

20 mg Hydroxyzine oral

10 mg 3-MeO-PCP Intranasal

Setting: My apartment

This is a report about the danger of being in a state of compulsive redosing and the dangers of stacking more and more substances on each other. I mean everything turned out ok, but the danger was present and this could have gone wrong in so many ways. This is probably the hardest I have ever blacked out. 2 versions of this report will be given, one from my perspective and one from the perspective of my roommate. I am very fortunate that I did not incur some severe consequences through the reckless dosing or through my behavior when in this state.

My version:

T0:00-Dosed ~3 mg of Etizolam from a honey locust thorn and drank a full can of monster energy. I was sleepy but had wanted to get very altered to get my mind off of a particular and humiliating stressor. I figured I would drink the caffeine to keep me awake enough to get fucked up without passing out. After some reading however, I realize that the effects of the stimulant might cancel out the effects of the Etizolam.

T0:30- This was the first bad sign. With this cancelling effect in mind, I dose a little more Etizolam, plus half of a tablet of 1 mg Clonazepam. As I would learn, mixing stimulants and depressants is a poor choice, especially when you take more of one to compensate for the other. I also throw 75 mg of DPH on the fire. I dose another ~1 mg of Etizolam. I rolled a really loose joint.

T0:40- I don't really remember anything past this point. I apparently asked my roommate to hang out around now, though I do not recall doing this, I just saw it in our messages the next day. My notes said I dosed 1500 mg Gabapentin, 20 mg hydroxyzine and ~10 mg 3-MeO-PCP throughout the night. I did have very vague recollection specifically of the exact moment I dosed these other substances, but the memory is still pretty foggy, and all the rest was completely lost.

The next thing I remember is waking up the next day at 1 PM. I hadn't changed my clothes at all and my room was in disarray. I found random clothes of mine strewn around the hallway outside and I found my phone in the bathroom, dead. One of my looseleaf textbooks that I had not used in years was scattered around my floor, things on my desk were all knocked over and various objects were not where I had remembered leaving them. I was fairly foggy for the rest of the day, with my full cognitive function not returning until around midnight, after taking several naps. 

My roommates version:
I had apparently asked him if he wanted to hang out and smoke. I came downstairs several minutes later with my loose joint. I apparently fell down the stairs when attempting to run down them. He said I had a blank tired smile on my face, my eyes red and struggling to stay open, as if I were incredibly stoned. I had a great deal of trouble forming coherent sentences and he said I was slurring my words very heavily. I kept repeatedly telling him to bundle up so we could go outside to smoke, seemingly forgetting several times that I had told him that seconds ago. Right before we were to smoke the joint, I said I had to go upstairs to get something. He waited for 15 minutes before checking on me. He found me just sitting on my bed looking at my phone, with my coat removed. I had apparently forgotten that we were hanging out. He decided we would just smoke inside.
He said I attempted to smoke the joint several times, but each time I seem to have immediately forgotten that I had lit it and just held it until it went out, all the while wearing that same blank expression on my face. This continued for a while until he realized it was something of a lost cause. I said I had to go to the bathroom and disappeared for 20 minutes again. He found me just sitting in my room  again as if I had been there all night. I asked that we play smash bros, but when he set it up, I didn't even select a character. he said I was still mostly incoherent at this point, unable to talk my way through an entire sentence, seemingly forgetting my train of thought halfway through. I apparently just sat there and watched him play by himself, dumbfounded.

Yet again I disappeared upstairs, claiming I would be right back, and yet again I seemed to have forgotten what I was doing and just remained up there. I came back down, bringing a bunch of stickers with me for some reason. I really cannot comprehend what my motivations were throughout this experience, aside from occasionally dosing more drugs, which I likely did each time I retreated to my room. I was an entirely different person in this state, incapacitated and impaired beyond any illusion of functionality. We tried to play smash bros again, and this time I did select a character. However, I would begin each game by immediately running off the edge, wiping out all of my stocks.
At this point he called it a night and said he was going to sleep. I offered to smoke the gravity bong with him before we went to bed. He said we went up to my room, and I just sat there, having already forgotten that we were going to smoke out of it. He said he went and grabbed it and operated it himself, while I just sat there watching him, confused as to what was happening. He said he left my room after that, and at this point I went to bed or something. The next day, I had no recollection of seeing him at all that night.

Escaline

Age: 21

Weight: 120 lbs

Dosage: 100 mg oral in gel cap

Setting: My apartment

T0:00- Dose taken. Feeling a bit anxious over the purported body load from this drug. I have prepared for myself a very intensely flavored brew of lemon extract and fresh ginger. This was done following a claim that β-pinene could be found in lemon extract and in fresh ginger. β-pinene acts as an antagonist of the 5-HT3 receptor, the same pharmacodynamic action as ondansetron, which has worked wonders for me in the past with respect to nausea and GI effects. 

T0:20- Feeling a bit of the onset. So far I just feel mentally wispy and faint, no notable physical effects to report. 

T0:40- I feel a jolt travel to my extremities, radiating from my upper chest. This is the only notable effect so far, but it feels like an alarm, like it's preceding a steep drop, it feels like the winds that sweep in before a thunderstorm. The nausea has begun to set in, but it's not the sort of acute, gut wrenching, twisting nausea that I am familiar with. It's a subtle queasiness, a slight instability in my stomach. I have also begun shaking a bunch.

T0:50- First visual effects noted. They manifest as an abstract swirling and warping of textures, first arising in mottled and variegated surfaces, but soon spreading to my entire field of vision. It appears as though ripples are pulsing through my existence, ripples that bud into smaller ripples, in a sort of fractal spawning of these visual distortions. 

T1:00-  Vomited without warning. Nausea was manageable up until this point, it was not painful or even acutely uncomfortable, but I found myself stricken with a sudden urge to purge. It was uncomfortable and unpleasant as expected, but I felt better after, which is rare. Usually when psychedelics make me throw up, I am feeling nausea and discomfort for the rest of the trip. I hope that I'll be granted mercy here.

T1:15- Decide to go outside and bask in the warm spring air. I smoke a bowl of cannabis and become wrapped up in the peak of the experience. I feel faint and dissociated and like I am having trouble understanding some fundamental aspect of the universe that I had been familiar with before, though I am no sure what that aspect may be. Visuals are light but apparent and are best seen in the clouds and on the surface of the pavement.

T1:30- I have become enraptured with a curious organism in my backyard and dedicate quite a bit of time to studying it closely. I feel euphoric, stimulated, and also very hot and sweaty. The visuals were most apparent by this point, resembling some sort of 3-dimensional crumpled diamonds. There were also lots of spirals, cones, and triangles, and all of these shapes blended together harmoniously to form ephemeral patterns that would transform and twist and rearrange in a state of constant yet coordinated flux. They were seemingly organic yet had a definite structure to them that implied some sort of deeper level of organization.The closed eyed visuals were some sort of 3 dimensional zig-zag shapes, like chevrons alternating direction or like step pyramids. The visuals are mostly neutral in terms of color, with some pinks and teals showing through. It seems as though the entire world is rippling with heat waves.

T2:15- Smoke more cannabis. Nausea is mild but not an issue at this point. The visuals are shimmery and shaky and overall very standard for phenethylamines. Nothing about them particularly stands out in my memory beyond the degree to which they were transforming and reorganizing themselves. Overall, they are somewhat lackluster, like an afterthought to the cognitive experience. The closed eyed space feels at once exhilirating and underwhelming. I feel as though I have a view of soaring through various faint and indistinct landscapes of stepped forms and round shapes enclosed by sharper ones. It is not a sensation of myself actualy soaring but rather one of simply viewing the passage through this space, as though I am watching it on TV. I am now joined by my roommate. I find conversation to flow easily, social skills in fact feel somewhat improved.

T2:45- The cognitive enhancement is marked and apparent. I feel like my mind is running on a manic fit of passion. I want to learn about things, I want to read and work out the intricate details of what I am interested in. I read about high level organization of the phylogenetic tree, as exciting as that sounds. But I find it impossible to tear my attention away from it and feel as though I am in a rush to memorize as much as I can about it. If only I could harness this to gain interest in my studies somehow and actually be successful in school. The visuals are now shimmery and fluttery, as if they are no longer textures applied to planes but rather 3-d forms, not entirely tangible or coherent in any way, but flashy and ethereal, flitting through the darkness around me.

T3:20- Feeling a bit of shakiness now, still reading a lot, still awash in fading visuals in the darkness. I am beginning to see tracers behind movement now and am catching little interjections of phantom movement, followed by their own phantom tracers.

T5:00- Mostly feel down by now, have a bit of a headache. Smoke more weed.

T6:00- As I smoke more I seem to be coaxing the drug out of from whence it was receding. I enter that nice warm headspace of coming down from a substance, where thoughts flow easily and words are more articulate than normal. My thinking is connected and coherent, I feel as though my mind has been stimulated throughout the entire experience.

T6:30- We watch a movie in a dark room now the visuals become more apparent now. The same patterns as before in faint relief on the wall, dancing and forming in an intricate interplay. Closed eyed visuals are no longer apparent, nausea has returned though. This is likely due to having eaten very little all day. There is still some residual uncomfortable stimulation. Also experiencing urinary rentention.

T14:00- Lie down to sleep. Fall asleep after about an hour of tossing and turning and lying awake.

Conclusion: This drug was better than I had expected it to be, but still was not very much. It, like some other phenethylamines, seems to light a fire in my mind, generating improved and accelerated cognition, leaving the dynamo of the brain feeling burnt out afterwards. Useful for socializing and for learning or engaging with media, though it doesn't particularly stand out in that regard in comparison to other drugs. Sensory effects are minor and are not particularly noteworthy or spectacular. The nausea peaked at the comeup and mercifully subsided after suddenly vomiting once. Overall an enjoyable although somewhat nondescript experience.