eh

Things have been slowing down if any of you may have noticed
I've found myself extremely busy this summer with quite an assortment of activities

I had an experience that really truly shook my to my core and really made me question what the hell I was still doing. Hadn't I had enough? What was I gaining anymore?

This lifestyle isn't sustainable in the context of the world we live in, unless you're Sasha and Anne. My living situation is about to become akin to house arrest and careful 24/7 monitoring anyways so its not like my studies will be able to continue effectively. Most of my associates have also realized the unsustainability of such a lifestyle, especially amidst the turmoil that is hitting the DNMs right now.
Consider this an indefinite hiatus.... I'm still doing drugs, but for fun, for augmentation of specific contexts. I do not really intend to pursue experimentation and trip reports for a long time coming. I've found myself losing interest and motivation and just being burned out in general.

I have 2-3 reports still coming, I've been slogging through writing them and they are all months overdue. Hopefully I'll have those up within the next month but who knows, I'm a lazy ass.

Stay safe, I'm still here if anyone has any questions.

edit: lol some things have entered my periphery that I would love to experiment with.... If only my living situation was more conducive to that... it'll be back one day

4-AcO-MiPT

Age: 21

Weight: 125 lbs

Dosage: 30 mg oral in gel cap

Setting: My apartment

T0:00- Dose measured out and taken. Powder has an odor reminiscent of acetic acid.

T0:15- Onset. Simultaneously a mental and physical sense of uneasiness.

T0:40- The uneasiness builds. It is as though I am dangling over a yawning, swirling void, its depths are ostensibly familiar yet I feel as though I cannot truly fathom what they contain. There is a great unknown lurking before me and I feel that galloping anxiety in my heart that precedes any trip. It feels like my limbs are smearing and warping into all the wrong places. The experience feels like it’s creeping up on me, slowly crawling over my mind like an amoeba, one little pseudopod at a time.

            I go outside and smoke a joint in the scavenged bathtub in my backyard. This kicks up the visuals quite a bit. The swirls of stucco on the wall above me morph into the twisting sinews of fish, snakes, and eels, writhing their way through a glittering stained-glass ocean. Corals and algae and diatoms begin to form in the interstices between them and wriggle through the vibrant sea. A colorful ecosystem has presented itself before me.

            I feel very mentally stimulated. I’m in a mood where I just want to read and learn about as much as possible, I want to inject information into my eyes and keep it in the vault of my skull forever. I find myself fascinatedly clicking every link I can on facebook, taking great interest in every little detail of a wide assortment of random articles, emphasizing deeply with each. The experience is at once profound and rational, stringing my mind along to explore depths I could not have imagined delving into before. I am outside in the air surrounded by plants and life and the soaring sky, but I find myself engrossed in my laptop and trapped in a long chain of links. I find myself getting swarmed by mosquitoes so I decide to go inside. My consciousness feels energized and enhanced.

T1:00- I am back in my bedroom now. The trip is swirling and nauseating- it feels like I am underwater. The visuals swirl and warp and blur my surroundings and it appears like there is a rippling surface high above me, backlighting the silhouettes of creatures gracefully swimming above. I am weightless and slowly drifting with the current, the waters wrapping around my languid body and dragging it along. It feels like I am SCUBA diving, but without all the uncomfortable and heavy gear digging into me. Overall, the trip feels watery. I don’t physically feel watery, like sweating a lot or having to urinate, it is just a sense of being surrounded on all sides by a cold, warping, rippling and pulsing sensation like the subtle motions of currents beneath the surface.

            I put on music and feel a great deal of appreciation of it, the sounds being harmonious and reverberant. Each note sounds perfectly placed, each tone resonates with vibrancy and depth. The elements of the music flow alongside one another and are distinct and discernible, yet at the same time they coalesce and unite into one glorious mosaic. I continue to read for a good while, taking in more and more information like a sponge. I am a filter feeder in this sea, picking out little particles of information from the tides swelling past me.  I am shaking a great deal and feel absolutely fantastic. This is much more euphoric than its close cousin, 4-HO-MiPT. I want to socialize and share this feeling with others, it’s a profound warmth with a touch of that overwrought empathogenesis, but not too much. I just feel excited about everything. The nausea stirs in my gut but its not too much of an issue.

T1:30- I am still lying on my bed. I have been reading grim tales of the consequences of radioactive pollution in Russia. The mood of the stories seems to be reflected on the grey drizzly day outside.  I lie on my stomach to try and quell the continuing nausea- it has been consistently coming in waves throughout the experience. I am awash with a queasy twisting feeling, like parts inside of me are twitching out of place and flapping around while encased in my flesh. The visuals are touched with even more color now and everything feels faint and dreamy. It is only my bodily discomfort that seems to ground me. I am still reading a lot and taking in as much information as I can as little tremors tickle their way around my limbs and joints.

T2:00- I am shaking so much, this is not really a good drug for just lounging around my room- it seems better suited to something with a great deal of physical activity, like walking around a lot or going for a swim. I begin talking to some of my friends on chat and feel a perceived heightened emotional depth. Like I am able to empathize flawlessly with their emotional states and respond in accordance to that. The conversations are deep and honest and don’t appear to be fraught with any specific transgressions. It feels like I am able to speak on the same wavelengths as the minds of my friends, as if I am providing a secondary version of them that they can bounce ideas and thoughts off of. This of course, may have been a hallucinated sense of empathy, a hallucinated sense of social competence, but the results seem to hint at some degree of proper understanding.

T3:15- I go out back and smoke some more. I feel dreamy and wavy still, like my entire world is being viewed through a very gently curved funhouse mirror. I lie down, appreciating the moist air and the darkening sky. The leaves are repeating themselves and pulsing with cool colored polychrome auras, and the forms of great vitreous serpents wind their way through the sky. Eventually it begins to rain so I go back inside.

T6:00- I am mostly down now. Despite feeling quite social and friendly earlier, it feels as though that has burnt out and I just want to be left alone to ruminate on the trip. Eventually however, I decide to hang out with my roommate as I haven’t in a while. Socializing face to face feels a bit awkward, as it always does after spending a whole trip alone- it’s like readjusting to room temperature water after spending all day in a hot tub- it initially comes as a shock, it’s awkward and immobilizing, but eventually I am able to fully immerse and acclimate myself again. We smoke more but at this point I feel like I am just getting stoned.

T10:00- Go to sleep without issue.

Conclusion- This may now take the throne as my new favorite psychedelic (behind LSD of course). The headspace is nothing short of delightful- it’s whimsical, empathogenic, and feels overall like a pleasant dream. It’s mentally stimulating and makes me want to do things, learn things, absorb information and stimuli for no reason other than the joy of knowledge. The sensory effects aren’t too powerful but still enjoyable and interesting, particularly in the way that they seem to be living, writhing creatures. The bodyload is a bit rough, at least when sitting still, but I found on a later date that walking around and staying active throughout the trip alleviates it to a degree. The empathogenic effects at the tail end of the peak were also a perk, hearkening to my experiences with 4-AcO-MET. Overall I found it very similar to 4-HO-MiPT, in that the essence of the trip was an ostensibly similar creeping feeling that gave way to deep mental stimulation and rational insight, with very organic visuals. The visual aspect of 4-AcO-MiPT presented as being “larger” and less intricate than it’s 4-HO counterpart, and 4-AcO-MiPT presented a unique empathogenic expert that its sibling lacked.